my life as a artist
a bridge too far
Thursday 31st January 2008 12:03 AM
Just a quick word to all the stone-hearted tyrants out there, who trade in death and lies. Just because I'm writing about football again, it doesn't mean that I haven't got my eye on you, OK?
A couple of years ago, when Huddersfield Town got drawn away to Chelsea in the third round of the FA cup, I wrote a poem reflecting on the contrasting wealth of the two clubs. Nothing much has changed in the meantime, and bearing in mind that most of my poems deal with eternal verities, I thought I'd wheel it out again, in anticipation of the same fixture in this years FA cup fifth round.
I would have preferred Town to have been drawn at home, in a winnable tie against a championship team, or one of the flakier premiership sides, but as any away draw, at this stage of the competition, is bound to be a difficult one, it might as well be a lucrative one.
Two years ago, Town earned £300,000 from the tie, and a similar sum this time would maybe enable us to strengthen the squad. At today's prices, we could probably buy the small piece of gristle from Michael Owen's last knee operation.
John Terry, the Chelsea captain, is renowned for his work-rate. He earns in one week, what I earn in one decade. That's some work-rate.
When it's Chelsea versus Huddersfield,
It's not just wealthy versus down at heel,
It's a fantasy against the oh so real.
It's dinner at the Ritz versus a fish supper,
It's Lord Snooty and his pals versus Alf Tupper,
It's a Starbucks triple latte versus a nice cuppa.
It's Sainsbury's versus the corner shop,
It's Stringfellows versus the high school bop,
It's pink champagne versus a bottle of pop.
It's world-wide removals versus man and a van,
It's the internet versus a string and two cans,
It's America versus Afghanistan.
It's world war three versus a bit of a barney,
It's the global arms machine versus Dad's Army,
It's pain au jambon versus a ham sarnie.
It's the bright lights versus love in the dark,
It's a raging inferno versus a bit of a spark,
It's a Wembley cup final versus a kick in the park,
It's Ricardo Carvalho versus Tom Clark.
So it's not just wealthy versus down at heel,
It's a fantasy against the oh so real,
It's Chelsea versus Huddersfield, nil.
Comments
Lovely bit of angry poetry brother.
Posted by Les Miserable , on Sunday 3rd February 2008, 10:16 PM
To get up to date its Nathan not Tom
And Google versus Rorymotion.com
Its a small cloud versus the power of the heavens
Its rich John Terry versus poor Phil Jevons
Posted by Darren Donkersley , on Friday 1st February 2008, 10:38 AM
So, still no 500 word comments allowed then? Fascist!
Posted by Les Miserable , on Thursday 31st January 2008, 11:18 PM
It did, at last.So, hello. Does this mean that I can put more than a brief comment regarding your rambling words of wisdom as opposed to leaving a brief brief comment regarding your rambling words of wisdom? Hello,hullo,hollow,hillow,pillow,pillock,hilloc
Posted by Les Miserable , on Thursday 31st January 2008, 10:56 PM
Work damn you, work!
Posted by Les Miserable , on Thursday 31st January 2008, 10:54 PM
Huddersfield - the last bastion of REAL potatoes if the Cadbury's Smash advert is to be believed.
Posted by John (aka Jono aka Jonault) , on Thursday 31st January 2008, 8:44 PM
I only come here for the validation words... today's is "repeat"... uncanny...
Posted by tom smith , on Thursday 31st January 2008, 1:45 PM
That last word: 'nil' Is it supposed to be pronounced as in 'eau de nil'?
Otherwise it doesn't rhyme properly, does it?
Just asking...
Posted by Steve , on Thursday 31st January 2008, 8:41 AM
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